Meaning
to hold back; to refrain; to be reserved; to decline politely
Nuance & Usage
遠慮する is one of the most culturally significant Japanese expressions. It describes the act of holding back one's desires or opinions out of consideration for others — a core value in Japanese social interaction. 遠慮なく (without reservation) is the invitation to stop holding back: 遠慮なく食べてください (Please help yourself freely). 遠慮がちに (tentatively, reservedly) describes hesitant behavior. Understanding 遠慮 helps explain why Japanese people often decline offers multiple times before accepting.
Common Mistakes
Learners often translate 遠慮する as simply "to decline" or "to refuse," but it is more nuanced — it's holding back out of social consideration, not a firm refusal. 遠慮します can mean "I'll pass/I'd rather not" in a polite context. The expression ご遠慮ください (please refrain from...) is used on signs (e.g., 写真撮影はご遠慮ください — Please refrain from photography). Don't confuse with 断る (kotowaru — to refuse/decline directly).
Example Sentences
遠慮しないで、もっと食べてください。
えんりょしないで、もっとたべてください。
Don't hold back — please eat more.
日本では、最初の誘いを断るのは遠慮からくることが多いです。
にほんでは、さいしょのさそいをことわるのはえんりょからくることがおおいです。
In Japan, declining a first invitation often comes from being reserved.
この場所での喫煙はご遠慮ください。
このばしょでのきつえんはごえんりょください。
Please refrain from smoking in this area.
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